The Joys of Running

As we approach the end of January, many of us will watch in dismay as our new years resolutions end with the turn of the page to February.  I am not one of them.

For quite a while a close friend of mine had been informing me that if I came to his workouts, he would help me get into the best shape of my life.  At first, I was like anyone who is afraid to better themselves.  I kept making excuses to avoid putting in the time, but finally I got tired of not working out physically.  My whole life I had gone to the gym and that had been up in Illinois.  Now I live in Florida where its like summer all year round.  I had no cold days excuses to avoid going to one of these workouts.

So finally around last March I finally forced myself into the workout.  It was a Friday and the group that I met with to do this run was doing a distance run.  Now as a runner, a 3 mile run is hardly daunting for me.  However, what I found difficult was the Florida Humidity.  That 3 miles was much more difficult than I had anticipated, but I finished the run.

My time was very inadequate and a part of my brain even told me then that there was no point in even trying to do these workouts.  But my friend then came up to me and said the proper words that I needed to hear:  "That once you walk away from the workouts, its even harder to get back into them." He also added that a majority of people who come to the workouts "Come once and never again"

On that day I decided not to become a statistic.  It was hard at first.  I only did the long distance workouts at first because I did not want to burn myself out.  Once I consistently was running on Friday's I decided to try one of the other workouts.  The Monday one.

Once I ran the sprint/leg workout, I realized that I had been holding myself back.  Rather, I was cheating myself.  A catch phrase of mine now when I do these workouts as well as helps others achieve them,

Quickly after the leg workouts, I added the Wednesday workouts which I have found to be the most difficult and the most rewarding.  While Monday is leg day and Friday is a long distance day, Wednesday is Spartan running day.  Burpees happen, bear crawls happen, jumping over large objects happens, lots of other things happen.  But at the end of the day I always feel great.

Its this odd psychological flux we put ourselves in where we know how to better our lives but refuse to do it.  Lately, I have seen the results of my near one year work outs.  I ran a mud run a few months ago and found I was in much better shape than anticipated.  With Savage Race and other tough races coming up this year, I am determined to take the next step in pushing myself.

So as January comes to a close, I would like to remind you all not to let your New Years resolutions also come to a close.

The Day I was Humbled by a Video Game

Lately as some of you may be aware, I have been dealt a considerable higher amount of free time than I like.  Many people enjoy this extra boost to leisure time, but I am not one of them.  Down time to me is wasted time and drives me mad.

Instead, I decided to use this time to get caught up on the very large backlog of Video Games I have been unable to play over the last few years.  I started with Legend of Zelda Skyward Sword, a game that has become (in)famous for its terrible controls.  The rumors were true as I discovered.

Now I got through the first part of the game almost dying a few times  to silly things like the newly dangerous Skultullas (giant spiders for those of you who are not Zelda Veterans) but I expected the enemies to be troublesome with the hard controls.  What I was not ready for, and the point of this post is the Boss Fight at the end of the first dungeon.

Breaking the normal Zelda Tradition, the (apparent) main villain of the game engages you himself at the end of the first Temple to toy with you.  Now Ghirahim is a creepy little Demonlord who the fandom like to debate the sexual orientation of, but that also is not what matters here.

What does matter is how much of a Wake Up Call Boss this guy is.  As already is clear at this point, the controls are the hardest part of this game.  Enter a boss who walks towards you and mimics your motion sensor controls trying to predict how you will swing your sword so that he may rip it from your clutches.  And he did, the first couple times I tried to swing at him.  

Once he takes the weapon from you, he even taunts you, saying things such as "How do you expect to win with predictable attacks like that?"  Of course this is the game hinting to the player how to beat the Boss, but it was still a nasty dose of humility, for again and again he would grab my weapon instead of me striking him.  

I ensured that he failed to rip the sword from clutches, but it was still an agonizing thirty minutes of me trying to trick the AI into blocking the wrong way to my swings before I finally got to the second half of the fight where the Demon Lord decides to draw a sword of his own, a Masamune that looks like it belongs to Sephiroth from Final Fantasy VII.  Being as tired as I was from being frustrated with the first half of the fight, I did get a game over.  Yes I know, I got killed in a Zelda Game.  I was pretty remembered with my poor performance.

After a little bit of rest, I decided to try the boss again with a very different tactic.  Instead of swinging one way then quickly reversing, I decided to flail the sword around as Ghirahim walked towards me with the thought of "If I don't know where the weapon is going, how will the game?"  As sad and foolish as this tactic sounds, it worked perfectly and I got to the second part quickly and got my vengeance on the boss for stealing my no game over clear.

Its funny though, for even after beating him, I could not stop thinking about how for the first time in a very long time, I felt quite satisfied at my victory and even felt a little like a character from a video game or movie that defeated a vastly better opponent by thinking outside the box.  I'll admit it was a feeling that I don't think I have experienced much before.

When a video game can give the player enough immersion that these emotions can surface as they did with me, that is a sign of a well constructed game.  I will continue to plow through this game despite the game's fake difficulty having felt some emotions that will certainly help with my writing.

The Power of Music

For the last couple of months, my life has been one wild roller coaster ride.  On one hand, I am now a published author and am gaining a fan base at a nice steady pace.  That part of my future is looking bright as are the prospects for future jobs and a chance to finally earn a degree.

Of course its not all sunshine and Coronas on the beach.  My current job situation is far from optimal and to get my physical wealth under control, I have an uphill battle.  But, that uphill battle is what makes the victory at the end so sweet does it not?

The reason that many never reach their victory is because they have found nothing to motivate them to reach that point in their life.  The future can be great and its fun to dream about what you may be like one day, but what about now?  If you are like me, Music is what gets me from point A to B

For fun, I will mention all the different music I listen to as I write this post.  At the moment I am listening to "Someday the Dream Will End" from Final Fantasy 10, a song about trials untold and potentially even greater ones ahead.  The song to me is a crossroads of sorts.  Many people reach such a point many times in their life and the choice of where they go dictates if they improve their life, if that life worsens, or if it improves.  sometimes, it can even be all three at the same time!

Music resonates with the Human Soul I think.  Different music relates to different people at different times.  For a man such as myself, who wishes to focus on himself and not on relationships and such, I feel little power from most of the popular music currently.

As the songs switch, instead "King Bulblin" comes on.  this song, a favorite of mine from Twilight Princess represents turmoil and mortal peril. One who faces a foe far more powerful and dangerous than themselves knows the feelings evoked.

To me this song also has another special meaning.  I use music when I write fiction to symbolize what I am currently writing about.  This song in particular represents a certain battle that readers of  "The End of Utopia" are waiting for.  A battle between two certain brothers.  One corrupted by terrible Magic and the other potentially using the very same Magic to defend himself.  I'll let you decide which of the two is more dangerous.

Next to play is one of my favorite songs from Video Games (and yes it is my preferred music above all others.) "Hollow Bastion" from the original Kingdom Hearts, a song as iconic as the dungeon it represents.  It has the added appeal of a unique time signature.  Some debate its 5/4, but I think that the best way to count the measures is in an alternating pattern of 6/8, 2/4.  This song is one that serves as a reminder that no matter how deep I dive into the very darkness of my soul, I can still emerge whole.

The whole uneasiness this song puts its listener into with its rare time signature, its harmonized minor keys, and its beautiful piano part carries me away to a world of magic and twilight illuminated halls. (And don't forget the Rising Falls)

Music carries me into a better future and I regret that most don't take the chance to slow down for a moment to take a breath and let their mind wander.  Music allows me to reach this state of understanding, and this ability to understand is powerful indeed.

The Different Types of Wealth

Wealth is a word that gets thrown around so much in our society that you can trip over it if you are not watching your step.  Despite this description of measurement being commonly used, you can talk to ten different people and find ten different answers to it.  Today, I will share my answer to this word with a simple denotation and very very complex connotation.

To me, wealth can mean two very different things.  On one hand, there is material wealth.  the amount of money you have, the amount of stuff you have.  The Movie Fight Club does a fantastic job of defining this.  (On a side note, I will probably break the first and second rules more than once so please deal with it on your own time.)  This, I have found to be closest to the answer that a majority of people in the United States, if not most of the world will tell you.

There is of course, another side to wealth though.  The emotional and depending on who you ask, spiritual side of wealth, which to me and related enough to be the same entity.  This type of wealth is a measurement of ones happiness and connection with the world around them.

Many people have people I have met will sometimes find much material wealth and have low mental wealth while the inverse is also quite common.  What is slightly rarer though alarmingly on the rise is a lack of both mental and material wealth.  I fear for people in this situation for that is to me the ultimate definition of misery and I pray to any in this situation that their life improves in some form for them to escape this deep dark place.

Most coveted of all though is when one manages to achieve both happiness in physical and mental wealth.  This is what the American Dream is founded on of course, but it is not limited to just one country.  This is the aspiration of most if not all Humans.

While there are many books and blogs that deal specifically on how to reach this lofty and amazing place, I cannot be the one to educate others on finding it for I am still searching for it myself.

At the moment, I am at a point in my life where I very well may soon achieve optimal mental and spiritual wealth.  after all, Judaism has become a powerful and very focal point in my life and has helped me escape from the darkness of complete and utter poor on every level.

But while great, my religious growth is not the only contributing factor to my improved well being. As some of you may be aware, I managed to get a part of a novel published in November and with March swiftly approaching, another part is soon to be on the way.  My goal then is to slow down the struggle I have had with part time jobs that give me no sense of security as I hope each week for more hours than I get and a sub optimal paycheck. Instead, I am transitioning to a point in my life where I am in control of my income.  A sense of control can lead to this mental happiness, and although the American Dream has changed slightly, the correct way I feel to go about it, is to do the things you enjoy and figure out how those things can bring you to the future you want.

Many people find that their choices are do what they love and make less money or do what they loath and make more money.  i have decided that I would rather have mental wealth than physical for I have found that greater mental wealth always leads to material wealth in time.

Thoughts on Rosh Hashanah

This past weekend was the holiday of Rosh Hashanah.  This holiday is unique in Judaism for quite a few different reasons.  The first of these is that this is a predominantly known holiday even outside of the Jewish Community by the rest of the world.  A second thing to note that this is one of the two holidays that Jewish people in general tend to go to synagogue for (the other happens to be Yom Kippur which is ten days later) The third thing to note is that this holiday is a symbolic as well as physical new year to the Jewish people.  This tends to grant us funny looks from other passerbys as the new year for a majority of the human race is on January 1st.

Being a new year for the Jewish people however, entails all of the feelings invoked from any other new year festivity: A sense of a new start, reflections on the year that has ended, and thoughts on where to improve.  Being also ten days from the earlier mentioned Yom Kippur which is the Day of Atonement, it is the start of our final chance to right wrongs committed the year before.

Of course, Rosh Hashanah is much more than that.  It is a couple of days of prayer and lots of food which is a custom of Judaism in general.  In addition, observant Jews also apply the same rules of Shabbat to this festive day.  As I outlined in another post, this entails no usage of electronic devices as well as not doing any work or creating new objects.  Instead of doing the things we would associate with an ordinary day, Rosh Hashanah like Shabbat, is a day of reflection and a chance to relax and enjoy the world we live in.

This new year of course is very significant to me.  I have a new book on the way, this blog is still relatively new in fact.  With a renewed stride, I am moving into this new year with sweetness, and not just with honey which is a customary food consumed for the new year.  Indeed, this New Year, I hope to take what I have experienced the last two years and apply myself to reach new heights.

In the words of Steve Jobs "Figure out where you want to be and figure out how you can get there today.  Every day you wait is another day you are not where you want to be."

L'Shana Tovah!  May your new year be sweet and help you reach new heights, and if you do not observe Rosh Hashanah for whatever reason, use this time as a chance to reflect upon your goals in an aspiration.

The Meaning of Shabbat

As I continue to explore my faith with Judaism, I have been coming to terms with ideas I have been grappling with almost my entire life.  First and foremost of these ideas is the belief that Torah is outdated and religion in general does nothing more than hold us as a species back.

The more and more I understand about Judaism, I am finding more and more that this idea is completely false.  Years ago, a close friend of mine set me on a path to self discovery with two simple sentences: The Torah has all the answers. We just don't realize it yet.  These two sentences have formed the basis for my understanding of Judaism and so, today I will explore my newest discovery.

For the first time in my life, I attempted and succeeded to keep the Sabbath as instructed by the Torah.  What this means, is I went 24 hours without lighting a flame, which by proxy means I used no electronic devices.  I also did not handle any money or do business of any kind.  The last aspect of Shabbat is to create nothing new.  Instead were are commanded to rest and enjoy what has already been created on this earth.

Obviously this sounds really difficult in the modern world.  After all, many claim that we as a race are notable for staring more at our phones than at actual people.  That the internet must always be within reach to have sound discussion.  Most of all though, we feel we must always be connected via social media to those we care about.

On one hand the internet has allowed us to see the world in ways that never were possible for us.  On the other though, thanks to our dependence on technology, we are able to view everything, but are we really able to ever see anything?

Shabbat was an eye opening experience for me because for the first time in quite a long while, I got to view the world in a way that I had forgotten was possible.  I chose to spend part of my time disconnected from social media observing the natural world around me  by sitting outside the synagogue I was attending and just listening to sounds as well as looking around.

The earth is alive although we depend on technology most of the time to remind us of it.  On the seventh "day" of creation it is told in Genesis that G-d rested on the seventh day to view his work.  In a mirror of what was done then, Jews are to do the same on the seventh day of the week which is Friday night to Saturday night.

Back years ago, families and friends mostly kept to Shabbat customs with ease as life was more centralized around community and micro towns and life.  While technology has turned our world into a much smaller place and allowed people from all over the world to connect, it also has had the adverse effect of preventing us from taking a moment of rest to just admire the world.

So as I found this last weekend.  Keeping to Shabbat in our modern day in my opinion is even more important than it has ever been.  If we do not take time to admire our accomplishments, then what is the point of all the toil and work in the first place?

Properly Using and Understanding Cynicism

I frequently hear day to day that cynicism is a destructive thought behavior.  While at times I am led to believe this is true, I still cling to my thought process.  This has led me to look deeper into the issue for I do not believe that I am a fatalist, so their must be a reason that benefits me that I retain my cynicism.

I began my search by starting with the people who were giving me the advice to be more optimistic especially in regards to trusting others.  Quickly I realized the cause of many of their beliefs stemmed from one of three causes:

The first was that the person was simply naive.  This was admittedly quite rare, but when applicable, I just took the advice for the grain of salt it was worth and moved on.

The second was that the person did not really experience extreme shifts and problems in their life that would warrant more of a grim outlook on the world.  When dealing with this person, it is important to note that just because their experiences of life are different does not mean there is nothing to gain from their council.  Being optimistic does have its merits and there is a time for joy.  It is finding that balance that is key, and the advice given by this person is a step towards that goal for the hunkered down cynic.

The third group is in my opinion the most important for they can empathize with a cynic mired down in their beliefs.  This third type is a former cynic that has found optimism where they thought there would be none.  This person in most cases has the most to share as they have experienced life in a way close to the cynic seeking advice.  I have found that this type of individual is normally the person a cynic envisions of themselves.  Not optimistic to the point where it borders on stupid but also happy enough with the world and trusting of their fellow man to the point where a fulfilling life is very possible and probably a daily occurrence.

Taking what I have learned from these three types of people, I still had some doubts about why I was a cynic and was still inclined to believe that I just had trust issues and the behaviors were still quite destructive in my life.  Still I refused to give up on the answer, so I decided to look inward instead and really understand what being a cynic means and after much trial and error, came up with the positive traits of cynicism.

Surprisingly, there are quite a few benefits to being a cynic I found.  Willing to question everything, practice more, and really putting in an effort to understand people were just a few of the benefits I found.  Of course I also discovered that letting negativity weigh you down is quite destructive and clearly as both the second and third groups of optimists showed me, you have to find the balance. That does not just mean being more optimistic, it also refers to how to properly use cynicism.

Questioning everything is a hallmark of both science and Judaism as well as a cornerstone of our entire society, being optimistic does not lead to the change that these powerful forces can bring.  To be a Cynic is to dream, to not be content with what you have.  Dreams create new realities.

As far as knowing when you have let the cynic inside overwhelm, once you have decided that the dreams you anticipate have become impossible, it is time to edge a little more towards optimism