Five Things No One Tells you About Asperger's Syndrome

This post is a combination of click bait and Cracked.com formatting.  Here we go

1) Communication goes out the window... Both Directions

It is commonly known that people on the Autism Spectrum including Asperger's Syndrome (Which I will abbreviate as AS from here on out)  have trouble reading body language which is considered to be the most important aspect of communication.  What is not mentioned is that people cannot read the body language of the person on the spectrum either.

Considering that communication requires body language, perhaps the idea that people with AS are creepy is actually a response from a Neurotypical (a non autistic, which will be abbreviated as NT from here on out) when they feel the communication is a little, well, off.  I find it unusual that more people have not made this connection with the way they classify people with AS as generally odd and a feeling of something being different about them.

It gets even stranger.  You know that feeling you have when someone stands behind you?  That sense of being watched.  Your body knows someone is there.  Which leads to the next point.

2) We are like stealthy ninjas.

Unlike NTs, when a person with AS stands behind someone, their lack of body language normalcy actually causes them to remain undetected.  This creates that whole creepy factor associated with the condition.  I have been asked why I speak so much.  The real reason is that I vanish quite quickly when I shut my mouth as do all AS people.

It certainly can be beneficial to be unseen when we want to be.  In fact many people with AS who are tired of being rejected by their peers seem to disappear from everything just by being quiet.  Others like me just use this skill to surprise our Mothers, who should be used to this sort of thing by now.  Still the amount of times I walk up to someone and tap them on the shoulder to watch them jump is quite amusing.  Other times, people walk into me due to not noticing my presence.

3) Society assumes we are all super geniuses...  and judges us as if we are.


People who know me well realize that I am driven by equal parts pride and ambition.  In fact, between my books, this blog, and all the crazy things I try to do from day to day, I aspire to make myself larger than life.  Part of that is due to my own ego, but it is equal parts due to society telling me I have to be this way.

Thanks to the romanticized Hollywood version of AS, the whole world assumes that this is how we actually are.  Unfortunately, because of this conception of our great talents, whether true or not, we have no choice but to be the best of the best.  Society won't accept us any other way.  And despite what you may know about Autism, the biggest difference in people with AS is our desire to be part of the world.

If this world does not accept us for who we are as humans, then we take it to the next level and become something more.  We become something greater than the average man.  sadly, it translates to lots of very frustrated people.  Not everyone can be wealthy and famous.  Some have to be poor and miserable.  Loneliness is of course a great fear in a person with AS.  We are willing to do all that we can to be divine among men per say to escape this fear.

4) Sociopaths seek us out


Imagine the most terrifying person possible.  A person capable of telling you a complete lie and you believe them.  A person capable of killing their own children and getting away with it clean.  A person who rapes and beats people and then convinces the people around them that the victim is the real problem.  If you know someone like this, congratulations, you have met a Sociopath.

It should then become scary to realize that any time an AS comes anywhere near a person with Anti Social Personality Disorder, (the scientific name for Sociopath which will be called ASPD from here on out) their attention will be directed at us.

Many AS find themselves in social situations where one moment, we are friends with everyone, and the next moment, everyone in the room is either pushing us to leave, or even worse, becoming violent.  This can be due to the subtle manipulations of an ASPD individual.  Their charms and manipulations allow them to control the situation, whatever it may be, and the first casualty is almost assured to be a person with AS.

When you see a situation such as this, do not assume that all is as it seems.  Remember, NTs, that this individual can make fiction seem like fact and vice versa.  Always try to figure out all sides of an issue before you choose to act.  You never know what actions may come as a result.

5) People with Asperger's Syndrome help each other

This is the most unknown point of this list.  Don't assume that people with AS ignore each other.  We help each other immensely.  Entire websites exist where we help each other.  From social situations to video gaming, to even sports. (which we do play)  Its almost like a religon of sorts except its not one that you convert to.

Still we help each other.  We speak to each other.  Know that when you mess with one AS, basically all the others will know about it.  We gossip just like other Humans.  We bring each other hope and when an NT or ASPD crosses one of us, the rest of us know quite quickly.

Crafting a Sequel

The End of Utopia is complete and is on Amazon to read.  But that's not what this post is about.  Instead I will go into the method for how I will continue with the next book.

Book 1 was certainly no lighthearted fantasy story, but for the most part, the reader gets  a feeling that the heroes can win.  A feeling that things will be ok, despite the cynical atmosphere.  Without spoiling anything of course, it doesn't last.

Book 2 however, is titled The Messiah of Nightmares and right from the get go, it reminds the reader of the terrible predicament(s) the heroes face.  Its more than that though.  If written well, this second novel will be an emotional roller coaster.  And not just for the reader, but for the writer as I continue to add pages to the book.

For me to correctly write this novel with the intensity it deserves, I will need to visit the darkest and most horrifying memories of my past.  A book seething with so much darkness, must be shrouded in such from its inception.

Returning to College

These last few years have been a wild ride.  In and out of multiple jobs.  Finally realizing that working retail is the greatest cancer in the job world.  Getting a book published.  Creating this blog also happened.

This summer I began taking online course again to make up or a more than 2 year lapse in my education.  Still one class is an insignificant part of my life and does not warrant an explanation.  What does however matter is that I will be attending school full time this fall.

I am trying to go into this renewed experience with optimism.  The pain of the last three years that I had spent at college are now behind me.  The old weak me that allowed himself to be Cyber bullied into the ground and allowed pathetic excuse for human beings to trick him into following their rules and advice is long dead.  He has been replaced by the jaded cynic you all know today.

Still this new me is ready to return to the classroom.  I am now mature enough that the social drama of a failing Greek System is the least of my concerns.  While student organizations will still be on my mind, the piece of paper that will allow me to gather other pieces of paper will be foremost as my goal.

Instead, my greatest fear now is whether college is worth it.  The way the debt (both mine and general student) has increased over the years, I would need to be making roughly $90,000 a year starting out to make it out ahead.  Will it be worth it after all the pain and misery I experienced in my younger years combined with an entire decade of my life that has been largely wasted at tasks far beneath me along side a love life that could be the punchline of a comedy skit?

My fear is not at all.  My greatest fear of all is that I will continue to live a squandered life because we live in a society ruled by people that go out of their way to ensure people like me with new ideas fail.

Bayard Rustin and the Greatest Failure of the Civil Rights Movement

When the Equality of Marriage Law bill passed, most non far right conservative groups were overjoyed.  That what I would like to say at least, but it seems this was far from the truth.

One group in particular that is still incredibly opposed to this law is the Black Community.

I found this appalling.  How could men and woman who have the rights they do in America in part due to a Gay (Black) Man turn against this group.  Bayard Rustin is not pleased wherever he may be now.  Then again, he was chased out of the movement he helped create after they got what they want.  Perhaps this was just a foreshadow of what was to come.

Still, I wonder if the Black Community is aware of the fact that they have become pawns in a game that they really do not want to be playing.  While they help a scary and violent minority on the far right oppress an entire group in such a way that their deeds are slowly becoming a majority of the population, I wonder if the Black Community sees the danger coming their way?

Take it from me:  A Jewish, Brown, Autistic Male.  All that is missing is Gypsy and Gay and I would be the poster child for most hated Human on the planet.  The Black Community has no business fighting against another minority.  For as they should know by now, once one minority group is on a chopping block, its not too long till others are as well.

The Black Community needs to look towards the ones who gave them their rights.  The ideas for equality do not stop at your community, or any one community.  Focusing only on yourselves will just allow your enemies to isolate and destroy you.  As a Jew, take it from me, it happens frequently.  Don't make it you.

Bayard Rustin sacrificed much to create a world that was more free.  His reward was betrayal and being ousted from his own movement.  Let us learn from this lesson and not allow ourselves to be divided and conquered.

Any Human Rights issue must encompass all Humans, or its doomed to help bigots everywhere in their wanton death dealing.

Burnout

We have all known the feeling.  Extremely overworked.  Apathy and low energy as constant companions.  As a writer this struggle is more constant than my shadow.

Work is currently taking a lot of my energy away.  Unlike just about any other job I have had, this one is not doing so due to a hostile environment.  For the first time in my life, the job I have is far more physically exhausting than anything else.

This has made it quite difficult for me to write.  When I work 5 days a week, I am forced to cram everything else into the remaining 2 days and one learns quickly just how little time is in a day when pressed.

School starts for me full swing in a month and with my future housing situation still filled with too many unknowns, it is hard for me not to be worried about my immediate future.   With my book still not selling well enough for me to quit my day job and just all the outside fears I bear, burnout is making a home in my heart.

Even as I write this blog post that I feel is directionless, I keep correcting typos every few words.  My hands meekly slither across the keyboard.  I am feeling tired, too tired to function at optimal capacity and it worries me.

Why I love Soft Sci Fi

After writing a blog post on why I hated hard sci fi and then tearing 2312 a new asshole, today I will explain why I love soft sci fi while praising Mistborn.

I have to credit author Brandon Sanderson as one of my greatest inspirations for writing.  He along with RA Salvatore are among my favorite authors.  But before I bring up Legend of Drizzt again, I'll continue to the point of this post.

Soft Sci Fi bring with it all sorts of incredible scientific phenomenon along with rich stories and exceptional characters.  Its brother lacks the second and third, abandoning them for the sake of explaining science more extensively than Tolkien described rolling hills.

Mistborn exemplifies everything that 2312 lacks.  Exceptional story telling, and equally fantastic characters that fill its pages from cover to cover.  Notable mention goes to Vin, the Female Protagonist.  One of my favorite heroes in ficiton and quite frankly one of the best constructed female characters I have ever read about.  she is the standard that I hold each and every one of my female characters to.  The standard rags to riches story for her gets thrown out the window almost immediately in standard Sanderson fashion.

The story of Mistborn which started as 3 novels and has now become at least 6 but probably 9 or more, has plot twists that you won't expect no matter how genre savvy you might be.  the science has not been abandoned either as Sanderson emplys one of his famous magical systems (or rather three, but I cannot mention them all without spoiling the series,)  And is filled with some of the most unique takes on mythological monsters.  The Kandra is a rather interesting take on shapeshifting spirits.  the Koloss, a rather out of the box take on Orcs that focuses far more on their brutal nature and makes them more than just standard mooks.  But my favorite of the monsters in Mistborn would have to be the Steel Inquisitors which take the idea of multiple monsters and manages to create something completely new.

Thats a Steel Inquisitor.  Yes those are spikes through its eyes.  Yes that is important to the plot of the books.

I really cannot stress how fantastic this series is.  I also cannot stress how much better soft sci fi is over hard sci fi with this book series proving straight up why.

The End of Utopia Part 3

It took quite a bit of work, but now that I have completed part 3, I can say with confidence that I managed to get an entire book published.

I found the final segment of the novel to be the easiest to write.  Perhaps this was due to finally getting the plot to fall into place after a whole lot of setup.  I will be frank though, the ending is not what readers will expect.  I hope this becomes the theme of my writing.  I plan to do the unexpected, as Brandon Sanderson, my favorite author of all time continues to do in his own works.

I have already begun work on book 2: The Messiah of Nightmares.  This book will be easier to write than the first.  Indeed, most of the work for this second novel has already been done.  In its very original rendition, books 1 and 2 were part of a book that is actually shorter than the End of Utopia is now.

Many of the details that make the story so incredible were missing from my original draft.  I also found the best tone to tell the story, as the original though by no means light, became much darker through all the rewrites.

I hope you get a chance to enjoy my first novel in the near future and look forward to book 2, which I plan to have the first third of that story ready by November.